Paradise Found

Well, we've made it up to Leominster, quicker than we'd planned,

Reasons to be cheerful? They're here on every hand!

We've found a house, quite like our flat,

Two bogs as well, to boot, a garden and conservatory-I think that it will suit!

We sold the flat in Bristol, a minimum of fuss,

It went within an hour or so, which really did please us!

It all "went through" as smooth as silk, no paperwork in reams,

What's more, the price we got for it exceeded all our dreams.

So now we've got a "nest-egg" and hardly any debt.

All is fine and dandy, and it just gets better yet.

We decided we would rent, not buy - give someone else the worry!

(If anything needs done, you see a "little man" will hurry!)

Last night the Landlord came around, to fix a sticking door!

(The weather has been very wet, 'twas sticking more and more.)

He's a friendly little chap, you wouldn't call him dour.

He said he would go halves with us. For putting in a shower.

We told him how we love it here, and really want to stay,

He said we should be able to, for ever and a day!

This little nest has everything that our hearts could desire,

(In the lounge we even have a coal-effect gas fire!)

We face a mini' roundabout, most interesting all day,

And both "Kwik - Save" and "Somerfields" are 50 yards away.

If we should need anything, that these two can't supply.

A little "Spar's" just up the road, and equally nearby.

If there's nothing on TV and we've not much to do.

We can get a video from spar, they even do those too.

Just across from our front door, is the Bus Terminus

You can even get some coaches there, which really does suit us!

If we're feeling poorly, an appointment's made-same day,

At our excellent Health centre, five minutes walk away.

They have a Pharmacy attached, it's all there on the spot.

We've had ECG's and blood tests, in fact the bloomin' lot"!

They really keep an eye on us, and see we stay in trim.

Our doctor is a splendid chap- we couldn't better him.

If we get in trouble or get caught on the hop.

Just two minutes up the road's the local "copper's shop".

Lets take a walk past Somerfield, and see what we have there,

Why! A chiropodist, optician and hairdresser, I declare.

The "Talbot Hotel" then we see, a good inn as we've proved.

(We had to stay there for the night, before we even moved.)

The "Royal Oak" that faces it is equally as good.

The beer is fine, the food is too - from starters through to pud'.

Our local is the Black Horse with ever changing beers

They treat us like we've been going there for years and years and years.

The "Grape Vaults" is another pub, that we both highly rate.

Great food and wine and beer as well, and a log fire in the grate!

There's the "Hop Pole" and the "Ducking Stool" "The White Lion" and "Black Swan"

"The Blue Note Bistro" "Rainbow Club" - it just goes on and on!

And that is not the end of it - the truth I have to tell.

We have the "Chequers" and the "Bell" the "Radnorshire" as well.

Pub life's different here from Bristol, where no one makes a sound.

You're in a conversation here. Before you can turn around!

Now, should you need a bite to eat, there's the "Flying Dutchman "Caff"

And Farrimond's splendid teashop - they are both far from Naff!

By the way our Kwik Save has a restaurant as well.

Sunday Lunch a Fiver's just one good thing they sell.

We also have "The Granary" which also is alright,

It's really quite Bohemian and put on 'gigs' at night

Shops in Leominster do abound, with all you could desire.

And if I said they weren't nearby, then I would be a liar.

Not only is there all you need, in shops, (served with a smile).

Everything that you could want is at most-half a mile.

It surely must be one of the best-served Towns in the nation

There's even a clock mender, down by the Railway Station.

The Post Office is quite nearby, its on the market square

(also the old "Three Horseshoes" pub is situated there.)

Our Bank is also on the Square - and that's quite handy, too

And only twenty five yards from the nearest Public Loo.

If you're in need of one of these, then you need panic not.

Because, for a town of this size, there really are a lot.

The library is very good and isn't far away.

Computer terminals abound, you can surf there all day.

We've got a lovely off licence the "Orchard, Hive and Vine"

With every beer that you could want (plus Cider, Juice, and Wine)

A couple of "Real" Bakers shops and Butchers, three or more.

Home made pies, all sorts of game, you couldn't ask for more

Our favorite is in Drapers Lane - he's an enormous size.

All kinds of lovely local meat and the words best Piglet Pies.

What is that smell along School lane drifting on the breeze?

Why! That must be the "Mousetrap" shop with every kind of cheese!

'Bout ev'ry kind of shop is here, for all you need to buy.

Fishmongers and a greengrocers, Bookshops and "DIY"

Electricals and Stationers, and the Garden shops are swell

Even a "Woolies" and a "Boots" gosh! We are served so well!

If you're looking for a job, the Job Centre's just a hop

(And in the High Street also, an Employment Bureau Shop)

But we've just managed to get jobs, it wasn't any fuss.

We work together and choose our hours - they leave it up to us.

Everyone is friendly and the work just suites us fine.

And management treat us like humans, (take note, City Line)

The Lion Ballroom's down in Town (they put on shows in there)

We went to a mouse race once - now aint that rather rare!

There's always something going on, a play, a film, a band.

And the Ballroom Building, I must say, is really very grand!

Under the Lion Ballroom, is the "Lion Gallery."

(We can't go there without we buy ourselves a gift (or three)

There's a big Leisure Centre, and we have been known to go.

To the "Oldies' Aerobics" class-but not for some time though.

Because we now work all day long, and walk to work and back

That's exercise enough for us. Our old joints start to crack.

Ten minutes walk along the road, the Railway Station, so.

We're well set up for anywhere, that we should need to go.

It's on the "main line" luckily, so we can go and come.

From Bristol, Hereford, London, or Liverpool, or 'Brum'.

Well, I think we've landed on our feet, dear missus Ratty and me.

In our "Nid des Rats" together, were as happy as can be

Everything's worked out so well, it really does amaze,

And we'll live and love in 'blisstitude' and here see out our days.