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Twenty things that make you a Herefordian
11:08am Friday 24th January 2014 in News
You know you’re a Herefordian when.....
1. If something’s really good you say, it’s mazin’ or tidy.
2. You’ve hit at least one pot hole in the last week .
3. You have to utter the phrase: “No not near London, that’s Hertfordshire”, on a regular basis.
4. Ironically, despite living in a predominantly rural region, you’ve said something about the traffic in Hereford at least once today and it takes you 30 minutes to drive two miles across the city. And you can talk to a taxi driver for an hour without drawing breath on the reasons why Hereford needs a bypass.
5. You end every sentence with ‘like’, ‘mind’, or sometimes 'I know'.
6. If you come from Leominster way everyone is ‘bab’.....”alright bab”
7. If someone’s not very bright they are known as a ‘banger’ or ‘butter’.
8. You call curtains, ‘curtins’, a balcony a ‘bolcony’ and if someone’s called Malcolm, he’s known as ‘Molcolm’.
9. You feel dirty all over after drinking cider from Somerset.
10. When you meet somebody new you can guarantee you can make a connection between a person you both know or are related to.
11. You go off the deep end if you’re accused of being Welsh or told you sound Welsh, but when you go on holiday you get so tired of trying to explain where Herefordshire is you say you’re from Wales.
12. You have started at least one ridiculous rumour while drunk – for example the Crystal Rooms is reopening with a headline set from Jesse J and Roni Size.
13. Claim you know someone that knows/used to go out with Ellie Goulding.
14. Have a born hate for Worcester. And if you come from Hereford you’ll have a born sense of superiority over people from Leominster – 12 miles away in the same county, and they in turn will have an inherent mistrust of you.
15. You will probably have had, or been to, a birthday party at Play Planet.
16. If you see Westons/Stowfords/Bulmers/Woodpecker in a pub outside of Herefordshire and particularly in London, where you’re desperate for people to know you’re not from the capital, you’ll become extremely excited and tell anyone in a three-mile radius that the drink was made in Herefordshire, then order a pint, even if you hate cider.
17. You order a “half rice/half chips plus curry sauce” with your weekend Chinese.
18. You find yourself endlessly telling people from anywhere but Herefordshire that, actually, Hereford is A CITY and not a town.
19. Constantly moan that Herefordshire is rubbish and there is nothing going on, but stay here anyway because you know - deep down - that it is the greatest place on earth, despite the aroma of dead chickens and sweet cider hanging in the air....
20. Unlike the rest of England, you know that the greatest year for sport was 1972 - not 1966 – oh and yes....you/your dad/mum/grandad/uncle (delete as appropriate) were there when ‘ereford beat Newcastle in the FA Cup.... It was mazing like.
Now feel free to add your own......AND - CHECK OUT 10 MORE THINGS THAT MAKE YOU A HEREFORDIAN...LIKE http://www.herefordtimes.com/news/10995537.10_more_things_that_make_you_a_Herefordian/?ref=mr
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