WHEN George and Sally Cooper married, they knew they weren’t destined for a long life together.

Just days before the wedding, they had been told Sally had pancreatic cancer and had only three months to live unless she had immediate major surgery.

They had planned a big reception two weeks after the wedding but, overnight, changed their plans, emailing friends and family to join the ceremony at Llandrindod County Hall then celebrate with them at their home in Builth Wells – and to bring some food with them.

More than 70 people came to make what George said was “quite simply the best day imaginable”. Days later his wife underwent surgery.

Today, he is mourning the death of Sally, who was mum to 18-year-old Lucy Jayne and a trained dancer and teacher, actress and choreographer, former manager of Community First with the Welsh Assembly and lately working with George in the veterinary business.

Sally, aged 54, died at St Michael’s Hospice on Saturday, six years after they met and two years after their marriage.

George knew the hospice when he lived at Bartestree, working as a vet in Hereford for 25 years. He remembers it being built and, because of the compassionate and dignified care Sally had there, he has asked the Hereford Times to tell of what happened after his wife’s surgery.

GEORGE'S STORY

It was two years filled with chemotherapy tablets, an S-shaped scar across her stomach from one side to the other – and a battle royal with a teenager’s anorexia.

That, and a diagnosis of the lethal pancreatic cancer, normally fatal inside six months.

Only a mother could find the resolve to cope with the demands of anorexia, and she did, seeing her daughter become well, take A-levels, and prepare for university.

Then the secondaries in the liver started biting. Pain in the shoulder referred from the liver capsule, back pain, feelings of nausea, none of which could be controlled in any way at home.

Fortunately, 25 years ago I lived at Bartestree, across the field from the convent and the embryonic hospice, and suggested my wife of two years be admitted to have the pain controlled, before coming home again.

Sadly, the progression of her disease outstripped our desires and it became obvious a return home was not a reality and so she surrendered herself completely to the nurture and care of the hospice. Her trust was absolute, the care and expertise simply stunning, rewarding her trust.

They obliterated her pain completely; they cancelled the sicky feelings she had and they reduced her anxiety to zero. She made a month in their care, in the tranquillity where birds and squirrels visited daily at her window.

The nurses and she were on first name terms and knew each other’s life stories as they popped in to assess her medication, change her patches and attend to her every need.

When she rang the bell, be it 3am or pm, they thanked her for calling them as they appeared within minutes.

They topped up pain relief immediately if ever there was breakthrough pain, all the time talking, reassuring.

Not only that, but family could stay and friends visit 24 hours a day. As she deteriorated, particularly in the final days, unable to eat or drink, or speak, they knew the signs and stepped in to sort out any problems without delay.

They called us at home at Builth if there was a change and, in the final week, I lived in a lovely house two minutes from her bedside, popping over regularly to see her and be with her.

The final time was beautiful.

She was peaceful, calm, content and free of pain and as she slipped away, we were surrounded by nurses who had cared for her, each to say their own goodbyes.

Such care is exceptional – except that it isn’t, for every patient in St Michael’s Hospice is accorded the same care. The staff have all the time in the world for patients, and for relatives, and, believe me, it is sincerely appreciated by this family.

And as this magical place celebrates 25 years from when I saw it being built, I wish to urge your readers to dig deep and support financially an oasis of real humanity.

Because of St Michael’s, its philosophy, its doctors, nurses and volunteers my dear, dear wife has been eased into the next world with dignity, and pain free.

We celebrated our second anniversary last month and I promised her no pain – and thanks to St Michael’s, I managed to keep that promise. Her cancer of the pancreas, a beast of a cancer, has taken her – but it did not win. Thank you St Michael’s Hospice.

■ A service for Sally will take place at Hereford Crematorium tomorrow (Friday) at 9.45am followed by a celebration at the Wyeside Theatre and Arts Centre, Builth Wells, at 12.30pm and all are welcome at both.

Any donations will be split between St Michael’s Hospice and The Bracken Trust in Llandrindod Wells, which supported Sally through her illness.